You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
