If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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