Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
