True but thats because hes a fetus.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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