the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
What did we do last night that was yellow?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
