I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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