nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize