I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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