Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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