So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize