apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
they need to just BURY HIM!
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
