i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
