come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
