just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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