Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
