I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
She even gives head with a lisp.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
