I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
