They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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