you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize