Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
