Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
