...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
