Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
