your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
