Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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