Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
