U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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