The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
