I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
