It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
