All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
