we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
