spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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