I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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