? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
