Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
