i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
