we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
