More tranny stories later!
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
