i was rollin on her like bob the builder
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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