Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
wakey wakey hands off snakey
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
