I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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