Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Randomize
