The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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