none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
