Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
