every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
zippers are such a cool invention
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
