what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
