You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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