We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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