We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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